*hugs* This sounds so painful. :( I don't believe there's one perfect person for someone, I think there's multiple people, multiple soulmates. I know you love her but she's not the only woman in the world. There is a great woman out there who will love you just as much as you love her. Don't listen to those people who call you freak or ogre. To hell with them! I know how hard that is to do though. Don't give up hope.