Similar age. I realized you either do it or you don’t. I choose to do it rather sitting on the sideline wishing something out of my control was different. Sometimes things get easier as you continue to do it. Other times, you learn coping mechanisms to make it work, albeit in an uncomfortable manner. There’s lots of failures and fumbles in between, you also learn who you can trust and who is an asshole, especially in a work environment. How someone treats you says more about them than you. You’re doing great, keep at it. The childhood self would be super excited to see you now.