Feels so frustrating

Feels so frustrating The key requirement in almost all career adverts: Excellent communication skills. I'll be great at communicating if not for these blocks and I hate it. I can't seem to do anything because it's so nightmarish. It's beginning to affect my confidence level and every aspect of my life. I feel ending it but I'm not brave enough to do it. I was once a socially active person, attended job interviews, worked etc but now it all seems like a dream and unattainable, making me wondering how I managed to do all that? I have a great personality and speak fluently when I'm alone but do just the opposite when in the need to use those. This is terribly frustrating.