You have just described my world. I totally understand you, I also felt so tired of stuttering but at some point I became even more tired of constantly thinking about stuttering and digging into it. At some point I was like, "ok, I get it. I stutter and it won't go, now what?" I left the stuttering communities and just focused on myself and the things I can control. I won't lie, I still feel ashamed, I still don't accept myself and I feel like I'm trying very hard to compensate for my stutter and who I am since I always feel I'm not enough. But still, I am more tired of thinking about it so I just do me.