Thank you, nukefudge. I do know that my way of thinking and my perspective of things is not positive like at all. I think that is my biggest problem and my therapist says the same thing. She says too that change doesn't happen over night, that it is a process. Call this naive, but I just figure with all we stutterers deal with, the universe could just once cut us some slack, make something easy. Of course I know that is not realistic thinking but a man can dream, right? It's also a timing thing which concerns me too. I'm 28 and still have a negative view. Is that it for me? At this point I wonder if things can change or am I so deep in my misery that there is no way to the light? Of finding peace within myself?