Do you ever feel guilty in moments of fluency?

Do you ever feel guilty in moments of fluency? Whenever I would look at a list of emotions associated with fluency (fear, shame, anxiety, etc) I would always be confused about guilt being listed. I made the connection for myself a while ago. Does anyone else feel this way as described below? I discovered I felt guilt when I was experiencing pure fluency without "my tools". I already accepted I was broken goods, so the only way fluency was acceptable to me was when I worked on my fluency and fluent in those situations. My mind was telling me, "If I'm broken it's disingenuous to be joyful of "fluke" fluency. I should only be happy about "earned" fluency." Therefore when I had random bouts of fluency I felt really guilty about it because I felt since I was using my techniques and it wasn't earned. Can anyone else relate?