I hear you. I’m 48. Have had many days where I have felt defeated by stammering, living my life on stammerings terms… I reached our for support in the guise of counselling about 25 years ago to process all of the above and to wonder how I might live my life more effectively, on my terms… I have challenged myself and I must admit I have achieved goals I would have thought previously impossible such as my wedding speech ( which I have recorded and dust down from time to time). What I have learned is life can be lived on your terms, although I do recognise this takes so much courage and a willingness to persevere. Don’t give up. Be kind to yourself and recognise and celebrate your “little victories”. You have much to offer, to the world around you and to yourself. The potential to become the best version of yourself and if that includes acceptance of your stammer, so be it. But this might take time, many years perhaps….I can’t tell you how much counselling has helped me..maybe consider this as a form of personal support or an investment in your own future…: