what's ruining your life is bring scared to stutter my friend, im a stutterer and i always was worried post graduation i wont find a job but i got one on my first interview, i stuttered it was fine by them. they judged what i bring overall to the company as worth it and im sure you will be in the same basket. Just stutter and be at peace with your stutter, people feel at ease when you're at ease. treat stuttering as normal speech behavior. some days will be rough some won't, its not an overnight process but start now :)