Yea. I was diagnosed with social anxiety disorder years ago. I honestly don't feel I suffer from that so much anymore or at least not nearly to the same degree but I'm still very hesitant to talk to people in general as I don't tolerate impatience or frustration from the other party so much. I'm only "anxious" when having to meet people because I can't predict what their reaction will be like but once I know they don't take kindly or show impatience, I do my best to avoid them if possible and as a result barely have friends in real life or family I'm close to. I do feel you on not being a 'normal functioning member of society'; many milestones that people reach or experience in their lives, I lack or missed out on but I do my best to make peace with that fact. In my teens and 20s I was mostly depressed regarding all this but now in my 30s, I'm sort of just disillusioned and cynical and see this as my cross to carry. I find my solace and comfort in the religious/spiritual life.