I understand how you feel. Just went to an event last night with a bunch of people from work. Felt like I couldn't contribute to the conversations at all. What made it worse was a girl whom also works at my job was attracted to me and the feeling was mutual. Needless to say I couldn't hold a conversation and it turned out the exact opposite of how I wanted it to. I really feel like this stutter is holding me back from alot of things in life and I hate it