Hey man, you’ve learned all this so let it be experience that propels you forward. Not something to dwell on so much. Maybe you can start out with 90% dwelling on the past, 10% hope and excitement for the future. Then start striving for new experiences and when things start to go well, you maybe will be at 50% dwelling on the past, 50% hope for the future. Then if something really goes well for you you will 100% be happy with your past and current experiences. Start gradual. How old are you btw?