I feel you, friend. The more depressed I get, the worse I stutter and it just perpetuates the cycle. Not being able to speak fluently feels like you speak a different language than everyone else sometimes and it’s very alienating. But there’s different ways of communicating. Betterhelp has the option to text your therapist instead of video call and the suicide hotline has a texting option too. Also, if stuttering if stopping you from reaching out and making friends then maybe find hobbies that don’t require alot of speaking. For example, I love pen-paling and writing letters! I hope this helps and hang in there!❤️