I’m 22 years old and I deal with a very severe stammer as well. I pretty much relate to every single thing you’ve said. Sometimes my family will still order food for me, make phone calls for me, or accompany me to make simple tasks that require speech (such as the doctor). It may sound antique or silly, but all of this makes me feel less of a man, and it hurts deep into my soul. However, I am not depressed, I live a very happy life if I forget about the fact I cannot communicate like 99% of the world does. But as you’ve said, we are used to it. We’re used to this feeling of dread every time we open our mouths. I’m lucky because I have plenty of friends and a good social life. Dating is a bit different, I do struggle *a lot* but I’m lucky enough to be considered attractive (sometimes I joke saying that making me handsome was god’s apology for my severe stammer). I do, still, sometimes fear that I will never find a partner because women end up leaving and I always blame it on my speech, even if it’s not true. I can’t help it. But I can’t help loving my life as well, the pros of being alive and experiencing the world outweigh the frustrations and bad experiences that stammering subjects me to. I can offer you a virtual hug and a good luck!