I don't even have sexual impulses at all, ever since my ex left me i've been in love with clonazepam. Sadly life went downhill after that. been stabbed by family and plugs. and all that shit. 5 times now and rebound anxiety kicking in making me want to relapse on anything. im isolated cause the place im from views stuttering as a curse and justification for shit. ive been trying to improve myself but i've always been nice and shit and sadly ppl used that. don't know right from wrong rn. trying to be a dad to my younger siblings who think im a junkie is hard, trying to fix this family is hard. and i used to solve the pain by abusing benzos. I've been blaming the doctor for making me initially dependent on benzos then cold turkeying it. but i do claim responsibility for snorting and taking high dosages and stuff, i can't listen to the music i like cause they all rap about benzos and stuff. and music is like a drug to me, but the only thing that is keeping me going is i want to prove anyone who doubted me wrong. cause they didn't experience it first hand and act virtuous and shit. they have their vices ( hookers, and stims) and mine were benzos. so they don't have the right to call me a junkie when im tampering and suffering daily. fking hell im sorry but needed to get shit out and it ain't even the tip of the iceberg. Anyways thank you for reading this. and hmu on disc if you want to talk, it's yubel *3*#6769 i'm down to talk and shit. anyways have a good day