I hate stuttering

I hate stuttering Can't even fucking defend myself when someone tries to make fun of me or embarrass me. I'm still thinking about it even after more than two weeks. I can't even study or do anything cuz i'm thinking about that fucking situation 24/7. I wish I was born without it. I'm not weak I just can't speak. People always stare at me when I speak. I don't want people to treat me kindly. I try to talk slowly but it is not always helping and sometimes you have to speak fast but I can't. fuck it I hate it I can't communicate with people. My life is ruined.