I am 57 and have dealt with this since I was 8. I understand all of your feelings associated with this soul crushing problem. 2 weeks ago I started speech therapy for the first time in my life. It has been so helpful. I doing lots of deep breathing and pushing through blocks. I think we are super intelligent to be able to substitute words at a blink on an eye. But sometimes that’s not possible. I’m not sure I will be fluent but at the end of the day I know I gave my best try. Keep your head up know we are in this together. It’s a saving grace these days to have texting and computers when you don’t feel like trying to talk. These are things I would have killed for in my early years. Lol. Have a great day!!