Is it me or is the secondary characteristics of stuttering even worse than the stutter itself?

Is it me or is the secondary characteristics of stuttering even worse than the stutter itself? Our eyes darting away/going to the back of our head Our lips moving like they have a mind of their own Our bodies shaking as we try and get the words out. I have a friend that stutters but with minimal "secondary characteristics" and he is super charismatic and has lots of friends. I stutter and have those secondary characteristics and I feel as if that's what's really holding me back from being seen as "normal"