Feeling Down. Don't know what to do :(
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Feeling Down. Don't know what to do :( I don't know what to do. This year I have been trying to adapt a change about my stutter and I have made some changes but they're not big enough changes to really make an impact. I've been trying to be more positive about speaking situations, talking in general but it's just so frustrating when you can't speak. Lately, I've just been having so much trouble with several sounds and I know I'm hitting each sound too hard, having tension but I don't know what to do about it. I know especially for letters like d,p,b,g,k that I need to use soft contacts and honestly practicing by myself I can hit these sounds softly easily. I just can't seem to do it when it matters such as in a conversation. It isn't just those letters though. Letters such as H, CH T, S, J are giving me trouble too. I know for these I need to have a light stream of air before turning on my voice to say these sounds. Again, I can do it by myself but not with people. I was having a conversation with my brother this evening and it's amazing how often these letters come up and literally on every one I got stuck. The air in my throat just kept feeling tight and getting trapped. I substituted many times because of it and even with the substitute words there was tension. I am almost 30 years old and can't believe this stutter is still holding me back, stopping me from being a communicative person. I know people like to say that it gets better as you get older. That's okay to say to somebody in high school because high school for a stutterer is honestly the hardest thing. For those who have given such advice, I really hope for those high schoolers that things will get better. But I am not in high school. I am near 30 years old and things haven't gotten better, not completely anyway. As I said in the beginning, I have made some changes but they aren't enough. I mean isn't 30 long enough for me to start living my life the way I want? If things do get better, when the hell does it happen? Keep in mind in saying all of this, I really am trying to remain positive but dammit it is just so frustrating when you cannot speak. I needed to vent.