I can relate to this. It sucks because I want to be productive so I can change myself but I just can’t. Which makes me feel worse. You might want to get checked for ADD, this sounds like pretty typical ADD symptoms. ADD can also cause stuttering. I have ADD and I’m pretty sure it’s also the cause for my stutter. I also stop stuttering while taking add medications like adderall. You may not have it but it can’t hurt to get checked out for it.