commentr/StutterOctober 21, 2019

Content

If you can get to the point where you can own your stutter, you've won. Stuttering gets worse the more you try to hide it and struggle against it so the more you accept it, talk about it openly and actually feel ok about it the less you will stutter. Even if you didn't, it wouldn't bother you. I'm sure you're aware that owning your stutter isn't something you an do in a day. You will have many negative emotions attached to it and need to unravel these before you can truly feel ok about it. Becoming conscious of your thoughts and feelings is an incredibly important step. Often, we just feel the feeling (e.g. fear) and run before we are even fully aware why. It's hard to explain this in a few seconds but maybe this helps you: at the root of every single one of our feelings is a THOUGHT. Every thought leads to a FEELING. Every feeling leads to an ACTION. So if you notice a feeling (e.g. embarrassment), try to trace it back to that thought. Then look at the thought and think "Is this true? Is this helpful?" Let's say you are thinking "Everybody will stare at me if I stutter". Is this true? How can you know that, you are not able to look into the future. But most importantly: is this helpful? Absolutely not because you can't control your stutter. Unfortunately there are a lot of hidden, habitual thoughts knocking about in our subconscious that sound like they want to keep us safe but are actually holding us back. Notice your feelings, trace them back to the thought that caused them and look at that thought. Our thoughts are not THE truth. They are just an opinion. Another really helpful question when looking at that thought is "Would my best friend say this to me?" Nope. Your best friend would want to encourage you, not bring you down. Start unravelling the Think - Feel - Act cycle and you will start to feel more confident about your stutter.

Themes

Anticipation & AvoidanceCoping & AdvocacyIdentity & Disability

Subthemes

Overthinking & MonitoringMindset shiftAuthenticity vs. MaskingIdentity & Self-Perception