commentr/StutterMay 21, 2025

Content

You ask good questions, you are primed to learn! As I said in my previous post, I like to frame my life as always happening "now". So whenever I get thoughts of the future or the past, I'm not in the future, those thoughts are happening right now. So thoughts to do with what I need to do later are just that - thoughts. When you live in the state of not clinging to any thoughts or feelings, you just flow, no matter what they are. It takes very little effort to actually make decisions or steer the ship of your life. Most of what feels like a lot is just wasted energy. When I get thoughts of things I need to do later I just accept them without clinging. My body will steer itself, and those thoughts which come may influence that direction, but ultimately I don't get preoccupied by anything.  Here's a concrete example. A thought occurs to me that I need to discuss something with my manager in our next meeting. And it may actually feel like something important. I'm just floating through life, not clinging to anything in particular. So when that thought comes I just acknowledge and don't cling to it. If I can feel 'flow' with the thought (i.e. non resistance, something that wants to be explored) I might follow it effortlessly, just to see where it leads. Then when I feel there's nothing left, I release the thought and continue on. As I continue flowing, I may get repeated thoughts of this upcoming meeting. And this is fine. It means clearly it's something important to me. Whatever it is I feel about it - excitement, anxiety, apathy, planning- I just accept fully without judgement or preoccupation. And keep in mind I'm doing this for everything in my experience. Then when the meeting finally comes, I treat it just the same way I've been treating my life before that- with flow. Notice the power of non judgement here. Just because I'm not reacting to a thought, doesn't mean my brain and body aren't making use of it. In the background my brain was probably laying all the ground work for me to deliver my best self in that meeting, all without that interference. Thoughts which come to mind may actually prove useful for laying that ground work, but the point is I have no control either way of that planning or the outcome. Do I have a choice in anything? I think so, but it's very subtle. I can choose which way to steer, but less so every individual step or how exactly I'm going to get from one location to the other. Yes I can choose to reflect on the past or the future. Again, aim to do this with flow and effortlessness. When it's something that needs exploring, you'll see how easy it is, versus unnecessary effort. The reason we're told to often focus on the present activity, is because this naturally carries opportunities for flow. Focusing on something means moving with that thing second to second. So ideally there should be less chance of clinging. But when you understand that, you understand it's not some dogmatic rule, and you're free to shine your attention wherever you want. It's the use of force and clinging which disrupts everything that you need to be aware of. And no one is perfect. Every mistake is just another thought in the now which we accept without clinging. In that interview Jack talks about how he worked on his eye problems after the stutter, amongst other things. Being completely uninhibited will probably be a lifelong journey. But when done right, your whole world will open up, and it won't feel like a chore.  The stutter will be one of the first things which disappears. What you discover about yourself and the world after that is your story to unfold. This is a lot to take in. Feel free to pass it round or maybe ask one of the mindfulness subreddits or a chatbot to interrogate it. My explanations actually feel somewhat clumsy. I'm beginning to see why Jack preferred simplicity over lengthy explanations. Ultimately these things are to be experienced,and I can only really point to you the way - you have to walk for yourself. But give yourself time, it will all sink in when it sinks in. I would caution you. When done right, you will see fluency as a by product. And perhaps very quickly. You'll know the type of fluency I'm talking about when it happens. Effortless, sharp, saying precisely what you intended. Don't begin to fall for the control thoughts once you see fluency. Healing from stuttering implies permanent change. You will not be able to mix genuine fluency with stuttering control. So how you get there is how you will stay there.

Themes

Coping & AdvocacyEmotional ExperienceIdentity & Disability

Subthemes

Mindfulness & BreathingHope & MotivationAcceptance & Pride