commentr/StutterMay 28, 2024

Content

That's a tough question. I've had speech therapy as a child, which didn't amount to very much. My stutter wasn't... /too/ bad, yet it conditioned me to stay quiet, and made me avoid social interaction, not develop my vocabulary as much, give me low self esteem, hinder my independence... The so-called "Secondary behaviors". These things were the actual issue for me. Imagine for a moment that you wake up and your stutter has vanished. Sure, the wiring's all correct now, but you're still left with the things that are causing you pain - The conditioned feelings of shame, anxiety, avoidance. Would you be fluent, when so many people who don't stutter aren't under these conditions? I don't think I would be. Instead, I took the approach of finding out, with a therapist, what I CAN influence. She kind of opened my eyes to the fact that I have control over my secondary behaviors. First, I hard-accepted that the stutter is part of my identity. Next, I took control - Ashamed? Disclose my stutter strongly and without apology. Nervous? I show self-awareness. Laugh at the fact they're making me introduce myself like this. Avoiding social interaction? I seek it out any opportunity I get - I tell myself "I am a person who talks freely." Stuttering is a disability, absolutely. But when you've taken control of the secondary behaviors, what are you actually left with? A shameless, disclosed disfluency, now lessened by the many techniques that you can effortlessly apply, because you are no longer preoccupied with anxiety and stress. Is that really so bad?

Themes

Identity & DisabilityCoping & AdvocacySchool & Work

Subthemes

Authenticity vs. MaskingIdentity & Self-PerceptionSelf-Advocacy & BoundariesAcceptance & PrideAccess & Rights