Thanks for sharing your experience! The thing is.. I think that most stutterers are intolerant for the pressure that stuttering can occur, as you explained so well. I also think that most stutterers have a distorted perception - somewhat black and white thinking - in which they believe that they either need to believe they will always continue stuttering (aka future thinking - cognitive distortion), or they need to believe that they will never stutter (high expectation of perfectionism - cognitive distortion). Both of these attitudes (mindsets), I think, will create a stutter pressure, and isn't that what you also experience? I'm not an expert, so my advice may not suffice, but is it possible to develop a new mindset or attitude without a cognitive distortion? Like a mindset where we are not fortune-telling, and also don't care if we would stutter by ignoring anticipation (we basically ignore the stutter pressure) and carry on regardless with our speech without 'reacting to anticipation or stutter pressure or anything' - so that it doesn't create stutter pressure. And the more positive experiences we encounter, the more we allow the speech plan to say the planned words (I think this is called operant conditioning) or what other ways are there to reduce this stutter pressure if not ignoring it