Stuttering is a disability - a horrible disability. It is a neurological problem where our brain has difficulty synchronizing our speech. There is nothing to be ashamed of. If we did not see well or hear well, we would not be ashamed. Same for stuttering. And just like vision or hearing problems, the best solution is a speech prosthetic such as the Edinburgh Masker or Delayed Auditory Feedback (DAF). I had many of the same problems as you, and they were great helped by a speech aid. Best of luck.