I’m sorry you feel that way. I think taking a step back from pursuing and charming potential dates is a good idea, but not for the reason you think. Trying too hard doesn’t work for most men when it comes to dating especially since things like chivalry are dying out. Work on improving yourself for yourself, whatever that may look like to you. I’ve been thinking about the areas in life that I’m unhappy with and trying to change them. I started with getting active, I used to be quite the couch potato but now I workout. A few years ago I would’ve thought that was impossible. I’ll take that sense of accomplishment over mourning my love life any day.