Why beating yourself up after stuttering event is THE WORST thing you can do.

Why beating yourself up after stuttering event is THE WORST thing you can do. Disclaimer: This applies to people that've mild/moderate stutter esp. those whose stutter gets more pronounced in feared situations. **Beating yourself up after stuttering is the single WORST thing you can do** both for your stutter and for your social anxiety. Every time you beat yourself up, you're strengthening the connection between stutter+social situation with a negative outcome. You're basically training your brain to avoid similar situation in the future at all costs. **Next time, guess what your brain will do?** It will do everything in its power to FREEZE you and STOP you from speaking (which coincidentally is called 'stuttering' & 'blocking'). Your brain wants to keep you safe from harm, and because you've repeatedly associated stuttering with negative (and potentially harmful) outcome, you brain/nervous system tries to freeze you up in similar future events. ​ **What to do instead?** * **DO NOT beat yourself up** after a stuttering event. You can think about it and analyze why you stuttered, how you stuttered, etc. But do not associate negative connotation to your stuttering * **Tell yourself it is OK to stutter**. It makes you uniquely you. Telling your brain that it is 'ok' to stutter teaches our brain that stuttering is a 'neutral' event and it should not evoke anxiety and fear when you're in a difficult speaking situation. * **In a feared speaking situation, try to stutter voluntarily for feared words**. I stutter when saying my name, so when I need to introduce myself in a group situation, I voluntarily stutter. The world does not stop revolving, and nobody bats an eye when I do this. But it calms me down, and I can focus on what I have to say instead of focusing on not stuttering. I voluntarily stutter when I feel that I might block/stutter on a word. Basically I'm taking control over my stutter, and dictating when and how I stutter. Once you're in control, your brain realizes that you're safe, and lets go of anxiety/fear. * Similar concept with disclosing your stutter. I don't do this, but it seems to help many people Hope this helps!