I’ve been in a similar place! When I was a teenager I used to pray I’d wake up mute or I told myself I’d become a monk who doesn’t speak. Your relationship with your speech *can* change very slowly over time, even if it doesn’t feel like it right now. And hey, sometimes you just need to feel the anger/frustration/shame w/o trying to “fix” it. There’s not a day that goes by that I wish I didn’t stutter. However, I’d also be a liar if I said the people who really matter cared a lot about my stutter.