I had the same thoughts as you. "I'm a freak" "somethings wrong with me" etc etc. However, there are things going on in the brain that are unrelated to you as a person. Let me explain further. We don't look at the person with epilepsy as a freak or that somethings wrong with them as a person. No. We recognize that there's something going on the brain that's causing epilepsy to occur. Likewise with stuttering, there are a number of mechanisms that have been laid out to determine that stuttering is a neurological disorder and we can separate the things going on in the brain from you as a person. At least for me, this has been the most therapeutic thing to realize. I'm more than happy to go through the different mechanisms with you, but just know that you are not a freak, and there are explainable things happening in the brain that are associated with stuttering.