I am slightly older than you (in the 4th year of my undergraduate studies, a fellow stutterer), and I am not at all nihilistic. I have a close circle of friends who wait for me to complete my sentences. So do the fellow educated people (e. g. my professor who studied at MIT) I have met in my life. It's the redpilled people who are not normally patient as per my experience. In fact, I just had a PhD interview over Zoom at a top American university, and my professor was impressed with me despite my stutter. I know a stutterer who is a world-class research scientist at Intel. Life will be better if you surround yourself with sensitive people, and are not outright jerks. Invest in yourself, develop a skill, engage in your hobbies, and try to raise your intellectual capital. At the (intellectually) elite levels of human endeavor, the fact that you stutter takes a backseat. Also, I have never done speech therapy (never had the means to).