Hi mate. Don't lose hope and keep working on it with you therapists. Therapist are good (not every of them) but the most important thing is to work on it yourself. Talk to others as much as you can. Every occasion you have to talk to other, seize it. Talk to old fellows, those in retirement. They will talk and listen to you because they feel alone as you. Most of them will never judge you. Do not blame yourself, it's not your fault. Just work on it, talk as much as you can and one day, all of this will be behind your. Take care. Cheers from France.