I feel your pain and anger brother. Maybe try to reduce your anxiety around stuttering or social anxiety? Also another thing that helped me; was looking in the mirror, accepting my fate, acknowledging the hand I was dealt was shitty. Then I began to feel grateful, there’s kids with life long illnesses and diseases or whatever. So I was grateful, that although I have a stutter at least I don’t have messed kidneys or cancer as a kid or teen. Then I started telling myself, constantly, and I mean constantly and continuously tell myself that I love myself, I would say, “I love you >my name<“ constantly over and over again. After a while, I began to care less about being judged or people thinking you’re dumb. Then in a weird ways, I began to be grateful that I stutter because it makes me who I am. I honestly think it has made me a better person fundamentally . I think for stuttering, it’s many factors that goes into it and you have to work on them all. I don’t know how my speech improved but it did and I am grateful. Other people, don’t understand the constant pain and anxiety we feel. But you’re not alone, wishing you then best!