If you could make it that you never stuttered, would you?
Content
If you could make it that you never stuttered, would you? I bet the average fluent person (and even average person who stutters) thinks that we wish we never stuttered. They might think that our lives would be much better if we didn't have this handicap. I remember thinking, many years ago, that if I didn't stutter, I could amount to anything. If I didn't stutter, I'd never feel anxious when speaking to people or crowds. I'd be able to give killer presentations because my intellect was definitely not the problem. I was smart as hell but my voice box was broken. I swear if I could speak fluently, I could probably speak like MLK and lead a revolution against racism, poverty, government corruption, etc. If I didn't stutter, I could change the world. I've experienced so much suffering that I could feel the pain of everyone living. I've accumulated so much empathy in my short lifetime. If ONLY I had a voice to spread my message. And so on and so on.. I thought my potential was unlimited. I then realized that I am who I am BECAUSE of my stutter. If I didn't stutter, I would be a totally different person. Judging from the self-centered personalities that I'm surrounded by (family), I'd probably be just as selfish, narrow-minded and materialistic. The main thing that separates me from them is my stutter. Slowly this acceptance helped me speak despite my stutter. This acceptance allowed me to openly stutter in conversations. Now, years later, Im the most fluent I've been since my childhood (when my stutter was barely noticeable). I still stutter but I don't focus on it and sometimes I completely forget that I have it. People tell me they don't even remember I have a stutter at times. The other arena my stutter has helped me is in forming relationships. The friends, girlfriends I've had these past years have been filtered unintentionally by my stutter. Obviously I don't want to be among people who are shallow and disrespectful towards me because of my stutter. I think this natural filter brought me closer to some great folks who otherwise I may have disregarded if I were fluent. So, if someone asked me if there's one thing I would keep that other people saw as a flaw in me, it would be my stutter.