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Anticipation & Fear Hi! I’m a 22F who stutters. I started stuttering whenever I was 10. I’ll never ever forget the day. I was in English class and we were doing popcorn reading. At the time I loved to read out loud and was good at it. I never feared it. This particular day whenever it was my turn to read I simply could not get the words out. I remember feeling so embarrassed and asked the teacher the pass. My class mates laughed and I sat there thinking there was something wrong with me. I didn’t had the most supportive and present parents ever, so I never got the help I probably needed as a child. My stutter was and is to this day the form of a block. I used to associate my stutter only with the experience of reading out loud. I avoided it at all cost. Conversations were fine, I remember I hardly ever blocked and I only feared words that began with “el” (Example: “eleven” “elementary”). 7th grade and 11th grade I actually became “fluent”, lost all anticipation thoughts completely. But it soon resurfaced. Fast forward all these years later, my stutter has manifested itself into every word and every scenario in my life. I’m aware that I hesitate and anticipate every single word and sentence, but feel like it is impossible to change this thought pattern that is so engraved in my brain. The fear of my stutter has caused me to drop out of college and take a couple gap years, the thought of returning terrifies me… a part of me feels like this is all in my head. My question is, are (some) stuttering cases strictly caused by anticipation and fear? Has anyone let go of hesitation and fear and was it immediate? Did it take time and conscious effort? Thank you!