Your English is awesome, I'm really sorry to hear about what you're going through. It sounds like you're dealing with a lot, and it's completely normal to feel overwhelmed and question whether it's worth fighting. But I want you to know that you're not alone. There are people who care about you and resources available to help you through this tough time. It might take some time and effort, but with support and guidance, things can improve. It's okay to reach out for help and take things one step at a time. You deserve to feel better, and I believe things can get better for you.