Some of what you say doesn't sound like it's necessarily related to stutter. Perhaps it'd be important for you to figure out to which extent your problems come from something that can be addressed separately. Then, of course, you should also address your stutter specifically. And also, you should pay close attention to how these events actually _go_. If there's no symmetry between your issues leading up to the event, and the event itself, you definitely have some work to do. Now, just go say what you need to say, and then start working towards a better place for you. Yes?