"I remember this one time I stuttered in front of x person I liked it was so embarrassing" V.S "I've spent every waking moment of my life questioning my own intelligence because of my speech" It's just the relationship that we have with stuttering compared to fluent speakers that makes us so hyper aware of it and emotional about it. You reacted that way because of whatever feelings you have attached to the issue you deal with and it's perfectly acceptable. And maybe you imagine a conversation with another stutterer as intolerably as you do because you may be projecting your own feelings unto them (I've dealt with this). That insecurity can be fixed with time and it's a process