I'm not sure I should give you advice as I'm in a pretty bad place myself. However, try looking up speeches from people who stutter. You might find this uncomfortable as hearing people stutter often causes us to project our self-hatred toward them, but try to hang in there. I believe that if we hate other stutterers because of our own self-hate, then the opposite should also be possible. Accept other people's stutters, and it should help you accept your own.