commentr/StutterSeptember 22, 2023

Content

I believe so. I got my stammer when I was around 7 years old after my nan died (my dad's mum). Over the next few weeks I developed a stammer. It's weird as when my dad told me she passed away I said "oh ok so she's gone to heaven" then I just went on about my day. I can't remember how I was feeling too much as my mind has blocked out all the trauma. My grandparents on my mums side had seen my stammer and started to tell me to speak properly. I don't have any hate for my grandparents as it wasn't up until these last few months (I'm 20 now) when I remembered that they did it. It was my mum who I remember telling me to speak properly and mimicking my stammer. Now after a conversation a couple of months ago I mentioned how it felt like she was doing it for around a year. But turns out she only did it a few times. The only reason she stopped was because my dad noticed my mum giving me shit for my stammer and told her it was wrong and not my fault. My grandparents stopped then as well. I don't know how much this contributed to my stammer but I've come to a realisation that my mum is emotionally immature and therefore through some fault of her own (as she was warned about her behaviour and it never changed) I Was emotionally neglected. So the one of two people I should of been able to come go with any issue. I wasn't able to as she made it about her. It was like walking on egg shells around her. So that definitely didn't help. So from the age of 10 to 16 I stayed quiet about my stammer suffering in silence. I broke down when I was 16 as my mum was on my case about me getting a job during school. Sorry for the long winded answer. Just wanted to give as much detail as possible.

Themes

Anticipation & AvoidanceCauses & VariabilityEmotional ExperienceSocial & Relationships

Subthemes

Experiential AssociationTrauma & PsychologicalShame & EmbarrassmentSadness & HopelessnessFamily Support & Conflict