I relate a lot to this, too much actually. Mine isn’t quite as severe as yours but most of my issue is blocking. I can sometimes have a conversation but anytime I’m asked a question it’s an impossible situation. I’ve taken to using the notepad on my phone to answer, as humiliating as that is. As you pointed out, you can forget about any phone conversations. People who don’t stutter don’t understand, they can’t understand the physicality of trying to force out a word. Like you observed many stutters talk about acceptance and embracing it, some even call it a superpower which is crazy to me. For those of us with extreme speech blockages this is a disability. I know for myself it has cost me several potential careers. I don’t have any advice for you, as I’m a mess myself with my stuttering, depression and what I suspect is adhd. I just want to say that you have someone here who understands.