So... fixing your self-esteem isn't a one and done thing. This will probably take a lot of work and effort from your side. If it's possible for you to see a therapist, that may be worth trying, although bad therapy may make this worse rather than better (and I would under no circumstances go to speech therapy - this has only ever worsened my mental health). But here are some of the things that have helped me: I think of my stutter as a disability. The stutter isn't some weird "habit" of mine, this isn't me being too "lazy" to speak properly, this is a genuine brain difference I cannot do anything about. And, like, we are taught not to think less of or make fun of people with disabilities in kindergarten! This means that anyone who would make fun of me for my stutter is an immature asshole by definition and I don't have to care about their opinion. And yeah, sure, it's a little harder to understand me and you need to spend a little more time listening to me. But realistically, we are talking about *seconds* here. If someone cannot be bothered to spend *that* much extra time to handle the diversity of humanity, I am allowed to think of them as an ableist asshole who isn't worth any of *my* time to deal with. And if anyone considers those extra seconds more important than hearing what it is I have to say, they are no friend of mine. If this is hard to apply to yourself, maybe try to think of it this way: what would you think if your best friend suddenly started stuttering tomorrow? Would you judge them as harshly as you're judging yourself? Would you consider it not worth talking to them unless they could speak fluently, to the point where you'd break off the friendship? Or would you accept the extra time and effort needed to understand them as a price worth paying to have this person in your life, and be angry at the idea of someone judging them for it? As far as meeting your friends goes... I'm not sure if you've told them that you stutter yet. In case you haven't, I'd seriously consider doing so before you do any sort of voice chat or meet them in person. Both because it will reduce a lot of the stress and anxiety about them finding out, and because in my personal experience, disclosing a stutter can be a *wildly* effective social move that makes people react to it *much* better. The script you want for this is *not* apologising for it (it's not like you can help it!) or treating it as a shameful secret, but a sort of: FYI, I stutter, here is how I would like you to handle that (just ignore it/please don't finish my sentences/let me know if you can't understand me/etc.) I started doing this some years back and the effects are crazy; most of the time people sort of fall over themselves trying to prove how accepting they are and how little the stutter bothers them. I think it's because the subtext of this sort of disclosure is "hey, I have a disability, and we all know only an asshole would make an issue of someone's disability. Here's how a good person would react to it." and the reaction of most people is to immediately try to prove that they're a good person and not an asshole.