First of all, Jake, I just wanna say there's quite a few people in the same boat as you man, and I know life is tough, but you'll get to where you wanna be if you try your best. To touch on some of the things you brought up, I don't think the "right" girls will care if a guy has a speech impediment. If a girl knows a guy well enough, then she won't care. She will like you for who you are. For all of the other girls who don't, forget them, they're not worth your time. I think as stutterers, our problems and issues are magnified, and get compounded much more compared to the average person, so it makes life that much harder sometimes. I'm 22 as well, and a lot of what you said hits home, and I feel like there's a lot of potential with you, it sounds like you want to do better. It sounded like you feel like you've been in a rut with women lately. I think that's totally normal to feel that, and I understand what it feels like to have that intense anxiety when talking to women. My best advice for you, is to build on the confidence in your speech. I notice when I have good days with speaking, it feels like everything else just kind of falls into place. I also feel like it helps to when I have a care free attitude when talking to women. Get in the mindset of "hey, even if I do stutter, so what, that's just who I am, and there's nothing wrong with that." Do other little things that build your confidence in other parts of your life, like going to the gym, even if it is difficult to get yourself motivated. I feel like I could go on for hours talking about this, so if you ever want someone to talk to, I can give you the link to my discord.