1. I read about a concept that is called "blackout" that occurs when you are about to stammer some people tend to go unconscious. You describe it pretty well youself. It´s a way of escaping or not dealing with the pressure of the situation. Is just to much to handle. Answering your question: yes, it is normal. My recomendation is always try to face the situation even the hard one´s. Don´t prevent yourself from feeling your emotions and whatever arises at the moment. Don´t blackout. 2. As you can see, the problem only happens when talking not writting. That make´s me think that your brain or "scanning radar" is anticipating a posible stuttering episode with a particular word so it is convenient to just forget the word. In your mind´s eye is better to appear to the world as a forgettable person than a stuttering one. You are just trying to avoid and hide stuttering. 3. Perhaps it is a bad habit. Or your low self-steam is anticipating a life-time of stuttering behaviour. 4. I did not undestand this one... hehe sorry not my native language. 5. Interesting observation. Fluent people tend to speak spontaneously, without thinking of the words. They just arise as they talk efortless. Zero control behaviour and no mind involved. It´s similar to breathing meaning that you don´t take care of breathing, your body does it for you. Stammer´s are just the opposite. They are very conscious of what to say and controlative. They see talking as a perfomance so they have a big fear of failure. You have to let go the control and be at disposal of whatever result comes of the content of your talking. We, stammers, had a difficulty doing that. We unconsciously think that if we talk freely, maybe we can hurt somebody or make somebody don´t like us. ​ We all experience eveything you describe at some degree at least. It is very good that you are aware because that make´s you an observer. That is the way to go for sure. Keep doing what you are doing and ask yourself: ¿Why I´m doing this? ¿Is this the only way of dealing with the situation? ¿Is this what I want? ¿Is this really me? ¿Is this my fault? These kind of observations and answers will force you to change yourself in a more supportive and confidence way so the stammering in time will disolve. Bye