I understand how you feel because I’ve been so angry myself before. I’m in a better space now at almost 50, and I can tell you two things. As stutterers, we are outsiders. There’s no way around it: we experience the world differently and we are perceived as different but never completely understandable. That makes it easy for us to be marginalized, but also for us to marginalize ourselves. That said, there is great power, beauty, and wisdom in experiencing the world differently. We can see more, feel more, experience more. Now for the practical help: we might not fit into “regular” society, which I see as the extroverted world that hangs out at bars and socializes around conformism. But that’s not where you want to be. Please find what you like to do and put your energy there. Hobby, interests, sports, whatever—preferably something coed and diverse (I would worry about joining self-pity parties or groups that amplify your sense of alienation). You’ll grow as a person, learn to love yourself better, understand that people are different and you don’t need to fit in with everyone, and finally, you’ll have better chances of getting to really know someone and be known, which is more likely to end up in a beautiful relationship (rather than a hookup at a bar). For me, a stutterer without looks, alternative music was my savior: I found a community, an identity, stuff to do and places to visit, and slowly also real friends, and then a boyfriend now husband. I still get sad about my stutter from time to time, but I don’t feel as lonely or angry anymore. Best of luck.