i’m so sorry to hear that you’re having these thoughts, i have them all the time as well. it’s important to remember your family and friends, their lives will never be the same, those are the people who love you for who you are regardless of your stutter, we gotta live for them. your stutter will never define you man, i don’t wanna give u a bullshit spiel about how it’ll get better bc it hasn’t gotten better for me either, but the way you approach it will get better once you take the proper steps to loving yourself. message me if u ever wanna talk to a rando who stutters and feels what ur going through, we’re always here for ya