I missed out on a lot when I was in speech classes as well, my mom ended up taking me out of the speech therapy because I complained too much about it.... Wasn't a good move!! I even got a job at a call center because I couldn't find anything else at the time. Definitely the hardest and most frustrating thing I have ever done, plenty of rude people that didn't understand. After sticking with it, my confidence started growing and my stutter improved a lot! Of course this helped me but may not help everyone, my advice is to step out of your comfort zone as scary and extremely difficult as it is. Especially if you are talking about "ending it all" just say f\*\*k it, I stutter and go out of your comfort zone.