Thanks Btech. I dont want to look back with regret and sadly I feel like im coming to a very pivotal moment where that is about to start. I feel behind the curve already and just cant "fake it till I make it". I dont know where to channel the necessary confidence I need to really not give a fuck. I wish I could warp in the future and look back and im also sorry you have to feel that way. I dont pity you because we are already blessed to have a better life than billions on earth, but I dont want to keep justifying my scared approach to life. Its frustrating, malicious, depressing, confusing, upsetting. Every negative adjective you can think of. I just want to show the world what I am and who I am. How the fuck does one do that when they cant even string a sentence together without croaking like a frog or looking away and blocking on the first word.