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Emotions from childhood and stuttering Hey all, I had a few behaviour patterns in my childhood, which I think are linked to stuttering. I was really afraid of people. And not only afraid, I had a really negative outlook on them. I didn’t like friends of my parents visiting our house, or even when I was playing with other kids, I always saw them as hostile and negative towards me, so I would turn to be hostile myself. I remember my parents asking me to go play with other kids, and my heart was beating so fast, and my stomach clenching. Eventually I was getting over it, but it was a constant feeling I had to go through before I could relax. It continued to my adult life, and I often catch myself thinking negatively about people around me. More specifically about how they are so mean to me, or judging me, even if objectively it’s not true. It’s like my brain goes off the rails, and enters into a negative loop. These thought also produce the worst feelings in my chest and stomach. And it’s as if my whole being is “blocked” around people, not only my speech. My body is blocked, and my mind as well. I can’t think clearly, or be my relaxed self. I’m just kind of frozen. It’s difficult to admit to myself, as it’s a really shitty trait. Also it really sucks, as when I’m alone and relaxed, I feel so open, and I actually really like a lot of people around me, but I don’t think I’m able to show it to a full capacity when I’m around them. I also almost don’t have any stutter when I’m alone. Not sure if anyone will relate to this, but this negative perception of life is definitely a big contributor to my speech blocks. Feels like I’m fighting everyday, but actually it’s all in my head, when I look back at it. I’m glad I became conscious of these patterns, but it has not been easy to get out from them, especially in the moment of entering social situations. Both mentally and physically. Would appreciate any tips.