I honestly think if I had access to a gun in my teen years, I would have killed myself. So I get it. What helped me was speech therapy and regular therapy. In my 20s I found the American stuttering institute. They focused more on acceptance and getting rid of the shame behind stuttering. That changed my life. Stuttering just became a thing that I did and oh well. I stopped focusing on it and focused on other things like my career and my body. I kid you not when I started working out and going out more just to have fun, almost everyone I met found me attractive.