im 20yo just like u and I almost went through your circumstances, if not worse. The university expelled me because of my absences and not giving lectures, and I sat in depression for 4 months and played the victim. I remember myself in my car in a beautiful winter atmosphere, and everyone was hanging out with their friends except me. In the car, my stuttering destroyed me and I blamed everyone around me except myself. If I learned anything from these experiences, it is that no one cares and that I must do my best to continue and try to overcome this thing. Yes, the first attempts will not succeed, but I will continue anyway. I know that these situations that you go through are very frustrating and cause you a lot of anxiety, but remember that you can use them as gasoline to grind and grind and move forward. Stay hard.