I appreciate the resources you've suggested, thank you. Life of Delay by John Hendrickson really sounds awesome. As for the rest- I don't feel inclined to explain all the dynamics of our relationship here or why I'm experiencing what I am. I will say that our relationship is wonderful. To suggest that I should end it because I have this discomfort, which I'm working to address, is unrealistic, and an overstep. And I certainly am not interested in your assessment of my feelings. Most ppl have things that don't feel perfect about their relationship, imperfection isn't grounds for ending it when things otherwise work really well.